Bila kau let other people down , kau akan terasa jugak . Rasa kosong and tertanya-tanya. Kau dah buat apa, how to reverse. tapi this's life. takde button restart, rewind . cuma ada play. pause. and stop.
Play is bila kau rasa kau dah yakin, kau dah nekad untuk buat something. it's a new phase in your life. kenal orang, belajar surrounding kau. Belajar semua.
Pause is bila kau rasa berat. kau tak dapat tampung. kau cuma nak rehat from people around you. it's not giving up.
Stop. Stop is bila kau rasa apa yang kau buat selama ni tak berbaloi. bila kau dah try hard, tapi tetap tak jadik. and it's time for you to stop.
This time, aku alter aku punya codec. buang pause and stop button. trying hard to find a way to put in reverse button which is no way akan ada. just play.
i know the risk. about hving no stop.
tapi aku taktau waktu play, aku nak kena buat apa. do's and don't. i want my home. yang aku boleh percaya to put in my fragile heart. yang aku tahu akan dijaga and will not breaks. tapi orang pun nak macam aku. nak letak hati kat aku, without get broken.
people trust you and kau break that trust. bukan senang kau nak dapat balik. boleh. tapi dia akan jadik much more fragile. which is bila-bila trust tu boleh hilang. bukan getting harder, tapi softer.
bila kau tau, bukan senang, kau nak try hard. tapi bila orang dah stop, kata memang takkan dapat, what will you feel? akan dapat, tapi bukan in this phase. i cant believe im laughing in tears.
jadik takut. takut untuk itu, takut untuk ini. kebiasaan pada kau akan jadi kekok. kau nak, tapi kau tak boleh. limited. i cn easily make people as my home, tapi bukan senang nak buat orang rasa that you're their home. you're enjoying doing stuff you like, tapi orang? consider, ain. consider.
im glad that there's appreciations that lead to promises. tapi manusia ni tamak tau. they want everything. without one of it, kosong.
people change, tapi kau ain? will you ever change?
confidence and all that is all gone. i have to restart. which i dont know how to begin. is it from that part, or this part. i dont know. it's not easy to find some reason for you to leave someone. not even have a thought bout that. takperlu pause, cz i dont need rest. "there's two days in a year that nothing cn be done. it's called yesterday and tomorrow. so today is the right day for you to believe, to love and live". aku taknak ketinggalan apa-apa. what's best or what's worst.
"we're all little weird. and life is a little weird. and when we find someone weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness . and it's called love."
my words are easily take by mistaken. what did i mean, bring other mean to others. i cant help that. sebab kadang2 aku pun macam tu. not kadang2, like always aku rasa. so, nak buat apa? aku kena terima je la. i just want to be home to them. doing that we have to fit our gears together and never give up. it requires both. not only one party. i hate misunderstanding.